How do you Answer?

I, like many people, have websites that are bookmarked as favorites to read on a regular basis. Most are updated weekly, like the weekly Torah portion, and other scriptural studies. In reading through one of them this weekend I stumbled upon a question at the end of a topic I was studying. It was a question I've seen many times before, but this time it made me stop and stare at it for a bit. One of those soul searching questions that if given the opportunity for study will cause you to question your beliefs (and you know how I enjoy that). It said;

"If you died today, would you enter into the Kingdom of Heaven?" [yes] [no] [not sure]

My immediate answer in my head anyway was 'of course'. Then I back peddled a bit, and began to think about my rashness to answer such a bold question with an equally bold answer. I could answer [yes] if I believe in God which I do, and believe in the Messiah, which I do, I believe heaven exists, which i do, in creation, and angels, and miracles and, and, and..

But i stopped...

Is my perception of a spiritual reality the right one? Is there a more unified view that I should be taking, seeing the larger picture of a grand reality? And would it be arrogant on our part to immediately be so bold as to have a pre-conceived notion of what God's answer will be when we get there, and be so assured there's a place for me as one of His children, like I've done anything special enough to deserve it? So then I said, ok - [no] should be the answer. Afterall, if we strip away the arrogance and ignorance and pride that goes with thinking you know the path like you carved it yourself, then the answer is indeed [no]. Because being sure of God's answer could not be assumed or guessed.

I stopped again.

[not sure].. hmm. That's the best answer of them all, i thought. Not for it's uncertainty, but for it's humbleness, and it's lack of pride and ego - to be so bold like many churchians to say 'Hey - I'm saved, how bout you? join our cool club of christian zealous worshipers, be like us, dress like us, because we're saved and you're not - unless you act like we do'. That's assuming alot. More than anything that kind of thinking falls right in line with cult-like ferver, brainwashing, hypnosis, and several other magical pagan related words I can't think of at the moment. [not sure] is a good answer. It calls us to look inward at ourselves, see our own worth, our own filthy attempts at purity and holiness. In truth, pride has no place so [yes] isn't the answer. [no] just means you have some more searching to do, and [not sure] means you're humble enough to admit you might not be all you can be, or have done all you can do, but you believe - and we can have hope, "May God have mercy on us all.".

Chris